Skip to content
  • About
  • Contact
  • Contribute
  • Book
  • Careers
  • Podcast
  • Recommended
  • Speaking
  • All
  • Physician
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
  • Video
    • All
    • Physician
    • Practice
    • Policy
    • Finance
    • Conditions
    • .edu
    • Patient
    • Meds
    • Tech
    • Social
    • Video
    • About
    • Contact
    • Contribute
    • Book
    • Careers
    • Podcast
    • Recommended
    • Speaking

An oncologist’s battle with imposter syndrome

Shikha Jain, MD
Physician
February 25, 2019
990 Shares
Share
Tweet
Share

Somewhere between medical school, residency and fellowship, I lost my voice. I knew what I wanted to do with my life. I thought I knew where I wanted to be in my career, and how to accomplish those things … until one day, I wasn’t so sure. I don’t know if it happened when I was applying for fellowship or when I returned from maternity leave as a trainee and was battling imposter syndrome and felt like a rudderless ship. It could have been when I was looking for my first job post-fellowship. But somewhere in my ten years of training, I lost my voice. As an attending, I found it in the most unlikely of places, through social media.

Throughout my life, I have always spoken my mind. Amongst my friends, I am known as someone who “tells it like it is,” and I have been told I come across as a confident person. But when I returned from maternity leave, my confidence in myself, and the loss of my ability to stay true to myself and believe in myself somehow vanished. I transformed from the person most likely to ask a question to the person hoping someone else would ask the question, so I would not have to. I felt like my maternity leave had left me “behind.”

Most individuals in medicine have suffered from imposter syndrome at some time during their career. I have found many physicians over the last several years who have expressed feeling they do not belong, that they do not deserve the position they are currently in and are struggling with self-doubt. When I experienced these feelings in the past, I thought they were unique to me. It can be isolating to be surrounded by brilliant minds and feel like you don’t belong. And it is not something that is easily discussed in the academic world. Through social media, I initially found individuals who were willing to discuss these feelings, and reveal their insecurities. Perhaps it is the anonymity of posting in a “safe space” that makes it a little bit easier to express our feelings that make us vulnerable. In the last few years, I have found an extensive network of mentors and colleagues both through social media and in real life who are able to share their values, successes and failures, and their experiences with imposter syndrome.

Many colleagues I have spoken to did not know the existence of imposter syndrome. Before my conversations with others, I did not realize these feelings had a name. Imposter syndrome was first described by psychologists Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes in 1978. At that time, they theorized that women were uniquely affected by imposter syndrome. Since the 1970s, research has revealed that men and women can experience this phenomenon. The International Journal of Behavioral Science published a review article that stated approximately 70 percent of individuals experience these symptoms at some time in their lives. Former First Lady Michelle Obama recently wrote about her experiences with imposter syndrome and how she also has feelings of not belonging, and self-doubt.

Over the last four years, I have become active across various social media platforms, and I noticed an increase in the discussions of this topic. I joined the physician mom facebook group when it had about 100 members. It has now blossomed into a 70,000 group of women physicians around the world. Imposter syndrome, mentorship, and feeling lost in medicine, are common topics addressed in this large forum of women physicians. With the increase in discussions related to imposter syndrome on social media, I have begun to see an increase in these conversations in the real world. Several years ago, I was invited as a panelist on a round table discussion for young women physicians in training to discuss some of the challenges we face in our careers. Imposter syndrome was one of the central topics. For the first time in my career, I heard nationally renowned physicians on the panel describing feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt openly, and how they worked to combat this. Some also described how they had never known others felt this way, until they began reading what other physicians were writing and asking about it in the groups on social media.

Medicine is full of extremely intelligent physicians who are high achievers. But does the culture also create a breeding ground for amplifying imposter syndrome? In the Women’s Networking Center at ASCO 2018, a distinguished physician from a well-respected academic institution said something that blew my mind. She said: “Don’t ever forget, while you may not be the national expert in a certain disease, you are an expert in oncology, especially when you are speaking to anyone who is not an oncologist. Your knowledge and understanding of oncology will be miles beyond anyone who is not an oncologist. So do not let anyone hold you back because you are not the world expert on a specific topic.” These words were like an epiphany to me and many in the audience.

In a powerful commencement speech, athlete Abby Wambach, describes the importance of having a “wolfpack.” She describes a group of people who become your support system and encourage collegiality, taking chances and using your failures to succeed. By finding these forums, in real life and on social media I began to see that I was not the only one experiencing these feelings. Over the years, I have regained the confidence I lost somewhere along the way, and I have again become the individual in the room most likely to ask a question. I still battle imposter syndrome, as I am sure most physicians have. But I have an army of supporters, and they have my back, even though with some, our relationship is virtual.

So thank you to my wolf pack. You helped me transition into the life of an attending and have guided and educated me. Thank you for supporting me and most importantly, being there for me, even when you didn’t know you were.

Shikha Jain is a hematology-oncology physician who blogs at her self-titled site, Dr. Shikha Jain.  She can be reached on Twitter @ShikhaJainMD.

Image credit: Shutterstock.com

Prev

The medical profession can help heal divisions as well as diseases

February 25, 2019 Kevin 0
…
Next

Turning a patient: a nurse's act of duty and compassion

February 25, 2019 Kevin 9
…

Tagged as: Oncology/Hematology

Post navigation

< Previous Post
The medical profession can help heal divisions as well as diseases
Next Post >
Turning a patient: a nurse's act of duty and compassion

More by Shikha Jain, MD

  • I am a physician, and I am scared

    Shikha Jain, MD
  • How can doctors stop fake medical news

    Shikha Jain, MD
  • How Barbara Bush’s legacy can help us rediscover the benefits of palliative care and hospice

    Shikha Jain, MD

Related Posts

  • How to combat imposter syndrome in medical school

    Margaret Hogan Smoot
  • Imposter syndrome and COVID: a medical student perspective

    Kimia Zarabian and Mai Hasan
  • When imposter syndrome becomes incompatible with the profession of medicine

    Claire Brown
  • Why developing new antibiotics is a losing battle

    Christopher Johnson, MD
  • A physician’s addiction to social media

    Amanda Xi, MD
  • What the FDA forgets in the battle against e-cigarettes

    Charlene Gaw

More in Physician

  • Practicing medicine with conviction

    Arthur Lazarus, MD, MBA
  • The power of memory in shaping human identity

    Emily F. Peters and Sandeep Jauhar, MD, PhD
  • Physicians have no autonomy. Here’s how to change that.

    Diane W. Shannon, MD, MPH
  • The erosion of patient care

    Laura de la Torre, MD
  • Navigating adulthood in the digital age

    Eleanor Menzin, MD
  • The power of business knowledge for medical professionals

    Curtis G. Graham, MD
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Reigniting after burnout: 3 physician stories

      Kim Downey, PT | Physician
    • The erosion of patient care

      Laura de la Torre, MD | Physician
    • Inside the grueling life of a surgery intern

      Randall S. Fong, MD | Physician
    • 1 in 5 doctors will become disabled. Are you prepared?

      Amarish Dave, DO | Finance
    • Assertiveness in health care [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Misinformed claims and the offensiveness of discrediting COVID-19 vaccine development

      Angel Garcia Otano, MD | Conditions
  • Past 6 Months

    • Medical gaslighting: a growing challenge in today’s medical landscape

      Tami Burdick | Conditions
    • I want to be a doctor who can provide care for women: What states must I rule out for my medical education?

      Nandini Erodula | Education
    • Balancing opioid medication in chronic pain

      L. Joseph Parker, MD | Conditions
    • Reigniting after burnout: 3 physician stories

      Kim Downey, PT | Physician
    • Mourning the silent epidemic: the physician suicide crisis and suggestions for change

      Amna Shabbir, MD | Physician
    • I’m a doctor, and I almost died during childbirth

      Bayo Curry-Winchell, MD | Physician
  • Recent Posts

    • Assertiveness in health care [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Epigenetics and our inheritance to future generations

      Vishruth Nagam | Conditions
    • Practicing medicine with conviction

      Arthur Lazarus, MD, MBA | Physician
    • The power of memory in shaping human identity

      Emily F. Peters and Sandeep Jauhar, MD, PhD | Physician
    • How Tratak yoga reshaped my USMLE Step 2 prep

      Dr. Nikita Mehdiratta | Education
    • Transforming primary care for physician well-being [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast

Subscribe to KevinMD and never miss a story!

Get free updates delivered free to your inbox.


Find jobs at
Careers by KevinMD.com

Search thousands of physician, PA, NP, and CRNA jobs now.

Learn more

View 1 Comments >

Founded in 2004 by Kevin Pho, MD, KevinMD.com is the web’s leading platform where physicians, advanced practitioners, nurses, medical students, and patients share their insight and tell their stories.

Social

  • Like on Facebook
  • Follow on Twitter
  • Connect on Linkedin
  • Subscribe on Youtube
  • Instagram

CME Spotlights

From MedPage Today

Latest News

  • FDA Relents, Approves Novel Antidepressant After Many Rejections
  • OSHA Comes in for Both Praise and Harsh Criticism at House Hearing
  • New Insight Into Hyperglycemia Risk With PI3K Inhibitor for Breast Cancer
  • Oktoberfest Doctor: Not the Wurst Job You Could Have
  • Blue Shield of California Has Fix for MA Enrollees Worried About Co-Pays

Meeting Coverage

  • New Schizophrenia Treatments Are Coming: Don't Panic
  • Loneliness Needs to Be Treated Like Any Other Health Condition, Researcher Suggests
  • Stopping Medical Misinformation Requires Early Detection
  • AI Has an Image Problem in Healthcare, Expert Says
  • Want Better Health Outcomes? Check Out What Other Countries Do
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Reigniting after burnout: 3 physician stories

      Kim Downey, PT | Physician
    • The erosion of patient care

      Laura de la Torre, MD | Physician
    • Inside the grueling life of a surgery intern

      Randall S. Fong, MD | Physician
    • 1 in 5 doctors will become disabled. Are you prepared?

      Amarish Dave, DO | Finance
    • Assertiveness in health care [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Misinformed claims and the offensiveness of discrediting COVID-19 vaccine development

      Angel Garcia Otano, MD | Conditions
  • Past 6 Months

    • Medical gaslighting: a growing challenge in today’s medical landscape

      Tami Burdick | Conditions
    • I want to be a doctor who can provide care for women: What states must I rule out for my medical education?

      Nandini Erodula | Education
    • Balancing opioid medication in chronic pain

      L. Joseph Parker, MD | Conditions
    • Reigniting after burnout: 3 physician stories

      Kim Downey, PT | Physician
    • Mourning the silent epidemic: the physician suicide crisis and suggestions for change

      Amna Shabbir, MD | Physician
    • I’m a doctor, and I almost died during childbirth

      Bayo Curry-Winchell, MD | Physician
  • Recent Posts

    • Assertiveness in health care [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Epigenetics and our inheritance to future generations

      Vishruth Nagam | Conditions
    • Practicing medicine with conviction

      Arthur Lazarus, MD, MBA | Physician
    • The power of memory in shaping human identity

      Emily F. Peters and Sandeep Jauhar, MD, PhD | Physician
    • How Tratak yoga reshaped my USMLE Step 2 prep

      Dr. Nikita Mehdiratta | Education
    • Transforming primary care for physician well-being [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast

MedPage Today Professional

An Everyday Health Property Medpage Today
  • Terms of Use | Disclaimer
  • Privacy Policy
  • DMCA Policy
All Content © KevinMD, LLC
Site by Outthink Group

An oncologist’s battle with imposter syndrome
1 comments

Comments are moderated before they are published. Please read the comment policy.

Loading Comments...