Physician

I could hear the scream from across the room. It was shrill and filled with panic. Any parent can identify the difference between the cries of normal toddler discomforts and a true emergency. I dropped what I was doing in the kitchen and found my three year old lying motionless on the ground, unable to move his left arm. My five year old was looking sheepishly down at the carpet, afraid ...

Read more...

When a baby arrives dead in your emergency department ... ... the world stops. You stop breathing. You are gasping for air. She is limp; she is cool; she is pulseless. Chest compressions on the tiniest six month old I have ever met are done with the finger pads of my index finger and middle finger. Quick, synchronized beats. I look at her blue, blue lips. It should never be like this. Her eyes ...

Read more...

Six months have elapsed since exiting the pageant of my hospital via retirement.  Like many people who devote countless hours to professional activities, some mandated, some by compulsion to detail, this windfall of unstructured time, no matter how well planned, can prove disorienting.  My final destination was a small inner-city hospital, preceded by twenty years affiliation with an enormous comprehensive regional center.  The people there, near where I live, have ...

Read more...

Most doctors well into their tenure of medical already have a general idea about how other specialists spend their days (except for radiation oncologists, where no one else knows what they do).  However, as a medical student, I had incredibly limited insight into the variety of means to practice medicine. Even as an attending physician, I am still discovering how creative some medical specialties allow one to be.  For instance, ...

Read more...

Dear friends— especially my colleagues, I recently failed a class (I have been working on a PhD in psychology) and found myself immobilized and disengaged from life, personal happiness and joy. I actually didn’t even tell my husband, who is my true confidant of my feeling and thoughts, until the following day. I found myself in that familiar place of guilt and shame. I thought I had transformed a lot of ...

Read more...

I was a resident. He was a physician in a position of power. He took things too far, and I spoke up. Here are some of the actual comments I received. “He’s just a flirt.” “You must have misunderstood him.” “What were you wearing?” “Somebody must have hated him, to do that to him.” “Perhaps, he just really, really liked you.” “Maybe you had a crush on him too and encouraged him.” I had started a new ...

Read more...

You may have noticed your child seems to be bored of their bag lunch and most of it being brought back home or dumped in the garbage. Lunch is an important meal to get kids the energy they need to get through the second half of the school day. Strive to include some protein, fruits, veggies and healthy sources of fats. Now, you don’t have to buy gourmet or even ...

Read more...

Once again, we find ourselves stuck between a rock and a hard place. Increasingly, providers are being pressured to improve access for our patients, which we certainly think is a good thing. We want our patients to come in, whether it's for their annual physicals, for ongoing routine management of their chronic health conditions, or for acute issues best handled in the ...

Read more...

I lost my attending to suicide. A lot of things about life changed that day. In the days of grief that followed, I was consoled by my mentor who suggested we meet outside on a patch of grass near the hospital. As we shrinks say, we needed time to emotionally process. I remember being grateful that I was going to get fresh air. The hospital felt suffocated by the all too ...

Read more...