These articles are written by anonymous clinicians. They have been selected and edited by Kevin Pho, MD.
“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”
– Maya Angelou
Since my teenage years, I have been watching Bollywood movies of all sorts. Maybe people from the subcontinent like them because no one can relate to these movies other than them.
My favorite hero was Sushant Singh Rajput. I liked him for his personality, his sweet smile, and the genuine look he had in his eyes. When he …
Read more…
“Today is the first day of the rest of my life!”
I’m sure you’ve heard that many times before; I’m sure I have. But in my obscure point of existence in this endless universe, that statement has never been more accurate than it is today.
Being a physician has been a flame burning inside my chest my entire life. I decided on it when I was three years old, and aside from …
Read more…
The banner in front of the ED where I work proclaims “magnet hospital.” “Magnet” status tells patients and visitors that the care from nurses (and ED technicians and patient care associates staff under their auspices) is so good that the ED should be a magnet, attracting patients and nurses to come here and inspiring other EDs emulation.
For many years, our ED’s annual census has been 100,000 patients. One might think …
Read more…
As a child, I was a daydreamer, especially in algebra class. Picture this: my teacher, reminiscent of Droopy Dog but on a heavy dose of barbiturates, droned on from the textbook. And just like that, my mind would escape – soaring out of the window of my quaint Midwestern high school, wandering around the courtyard square.
Back then, several businesses on the square were small physician offices. You could spot white-coated …
Read more…
Imagine this scenario.
You’re negotiating the sale of your widget. Despite your earnest efforts, you hit a deadlock. The buyer, after consulting an expert on “fair market value” for widget prices, firmly states they won’t purchase your widget for $5.
In a new tactic, you turn away from the customer, shed your white coat, don a pair of Groucho Marx glasses, and pivot back.
“I’m the CEO of WidgetCorp. Ten bucks, take it …
Read more…
If you find yourself heading down a rabbit hole pursuing a diagnosis, consider using a Markov chain to get back out. No, it’s not a physical chain. It’s a metaphorical chain.
In mathematics, statistics, and research, a Markov chain is a series of branching events where the options of what comes next at each branch point are not limited by what happened at a previous branch point. That is, each step …
Read more…
If there is one root cause of all the disgruntlement among health care workers, it is that we lost autonomy due to hospital consolidation. Relationships are largely about leverage. With rare exceptions, a single doctor cannot dramatically impact the bottom line of a hospital chain, whereas the loss of your professional income—particularly for those of us geographically rooted in an area with few alternatives—is devastating.
The beauty of locums is that …
Read more…
It’s a busy day in the emergency department. The waiting room is full, and we are short-staffed. I just read an email from administration that morning about how our treat and release times are “slipping,” and in the same breath, they remind us of the importance of patient satisfaction. There are many patients in the department with chronic medical problems or chief complaints that could be interpreted as non-emergent. I …
Read more…
How did I get here? Heading to the highest place I can find, in contemplation of jumping and falling to my death. I had always feared death before this point, but now it seemed the only logical solution. I seemed to have it all going my way. So why would a medical resident in a coveted training program in one of the most beautiful parts of the country, with a …
Read more…
I am writing to express my extreme disappointment in my specialty’s national board organization and its lack of response to the tragedy still unfolding in Israel. Ophthalmology oral boards are currently scheduled for 10/20/2023 through 10/22/2023, and I have received multiple notifications this week regarding testing logistics but not a single reference to a terrorist attack on the scale of the bombing of the Twin Towers in New York City. …
Read more…
When I received an email from her in March, it was exceptionally helpful and genuine. You could tell she exuded that class president energy and was a true leader. Dr. Mortimer sounded excited for residency to begin.
We met each other across the green at the mandatory, unpaid 4-day orientation. She seemed laid-back and content. I remember the one week of electives we were granted was scheduled early for her. By …
Read more…
An excerpt from The Adventures of Dr. Anonymous.
During the COVID pandemic, I wished I could put out a public service announcement for physicians, patients, and families about end-of-life care. Palliative care is critical to hospitalist practice and one of the least discussed fields of medicine. It also is a major …
Read more…
A phrase commonly heard is “reproductive rights,” and while there is some variability in what this entails, in most cases, this includes a woman’s right to choose not to be sexually active, to say no to unwanted sex, to access contraception, to receive appropriate and adequate care during pregnancy, and to seek abortion. By definition, rights are “a moral or legal entitlement to have or obtain something or to act …
Read more…
As I sit here contemplating the beginning of this unsent letter, I find myself questioning its intended recipient and purpose. The truth is, I don’t have the answers just yet. Perhaps, by the end of these few paragraphs, some clarity will emerge.
When I left my home country to come to the United States, I envisioned hospitals here as being on par with what we would consider “first-world country” institutions. I …
Read more…
I’m so sorry, but the pain was too much, and I couldn’t continue. I have witnessed patients crying themselves to sleep while nurses held their hands, praying for their treatments to be approved, giving them one more chance at life. Nurses try to juggle 8, 9, 10, or more patients during their shifts, holding onto their compassion with the last thread of hope that things will improve. Yet, they’ve also …
Read more…
According to Sir William Osler, “The practice of medicine is an art, not a trade; a calling, not a business …” This calling inherently involves sacrifices. How many of us would sacrifice our freedom, livelihood, or even lives for this calling as the clinicians in Iran have been doing? Iranian doctors demonstrated their bravery in September 2022 when 800 members of the Iranian Medical Council denounced the authorities’ attempt to …
Read more…
Question: What do doctors and nursing burnout, the COVID pandemic, and the Easter Bunny have in common?
Answer: Not a damn thing.
For the past few years, any article on medical labor shortages, disgruntlement, or changes in employment, such as the rise of travel nurses or locum physicians, invariably cited the same cause: COVID.
But to get to the real cause of what’s going on, you have to go further back. Much further …
Read more…
Weighing in on abortion invites scorn and derision from all sides. However, physicians should help frame the medical context with the aim of therapeutically healing the gaping societal wounds that the abortion debate has opened.
Our Declaration of Independence identifies an individual’s unalienable rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. The question arises: Who defines when a human life begins? At what point does a fetus become an “individual” …
Read more…
I love two nurses. One of them is my son, and the other is someone very close to me. She’ll have her own article.
My son has just finished his seventh 12-hour ICU shift. He’s wiped out, devastated, and shell-shocked. Let me introduce him to you before sharing his pain.
The kid was always enthusiastic about medicine. He wanted to be a physician more than anything. Maybe it runs in the family; …
Read more…
“We fear that CPS is going to take them away,” the mother of my patient chokes with tears. My patient on the inpatient pediatric wards looks at me with guarded eyes. I can still see the markings on their neck where they tried to strangle themselves. They were intubated in the pediatric ICU. This transgender patient and their family have gone through a living hell only to come out again …
Read more…