Skip to content
  • About
  • Contact
  • Contribute
  • Book
  • Careers
  • Podcast
  • Recommended
  • Speaking
  • All
  • Physician
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
  • Video
    • All
    • Physician
    • Practice
    • Policy
    • Finance
    • Conditions
    • .edu
    • Patient
    • Meds
    • Tech
    • Social
    • Video
    • About
    • Contact
    • Contribute
    • Book
    • Careers
    • Podcast
    • Recommended
    • Speaking

5 confessions of a medical student

Orly Farber
Education
June 27, 2019
189 Shares
Share
Tweet
Share

I’ve finally stopped thinking about the process of getting into medical school. But with friends going through the application cycle, waiting on and making decisions, I’ve been reflecting on my process and remembering just how terrible the whole thing felt. To offer some support to those going through it, I wanted to confess a few things. These confessions feel silly and small in retrospect, but I hope they’ll help at least one other current student or applicant know: You’re so not alone.

Confession one: I took the MCAT twice even though I was told taking it that second time would decrease my chances of admission. I was told this would be a “major obstacle” during my application cycle. It was and it wasn’t, but I’m glad I took it again.

Confession two: I laughed when I found out I was invited to interview at Stanford. I thought it was hilarious that the invitation followed so many rejection letters from less highly ranked schools. And I do mean, so many rejection letters. “Dear Ms. Farber, We regret to inform you …” was practically my desktop background for weeks.

Confession three: I interviewed at Stanford on the very last day interviews were offered. I perused the internet’s black hole of med school application forums, reading comment after comment from nervous pre-meds about how interviewing on the last day meant you “practically had no chance” of acceptance. I made peace with my sentence and treated the interview like a vacation, nothing more.

Confession four: When I got into Stanford a few weeks later, I cried. Not purely tears of joy. It was my birthday, exactly two years ago. I got the call while riding the DC metro, and I sobbed under the concrete dome of the Crystal City station while passengers looked on. I didn’t want to move to California, but I knew that my other options couldn’t compete with Stanford’s resources.

Confession five: Unlike many of my classmates, I didn’t apply to Harvard. The other night my friend and I were eating takeout and watching The Office when she confessed that Stanford was the only medical school she got into. “And I barely even interviewed,” she added. “It drives me crazy when everyone talks about the ‘medical school trail’ like it’s the Oregon Trail or something.” I laughed so hard at her metaphor, and then told her how much I could relate. I only had a handful of interviews and acceptances, and I grow quiet whenever classmates talk about their second-look visits at Harvard — a school I never even considered applying to because it felt too far beyond my reach.

With my confessions out of the way, I’ll say that I’m happy to be here now. I love the California weather, the funny moss-covered trees, my wonderful friends, and the fact that this institution supports my specific research and writing interests. Even on bad days, I feel lucky to have been admitted.

But as trivial as these confessions now seem, they do linger in certain ways. Although I’ve stopped wondering how and why I got in, I’ll likely never feel that my place here was hard-earned, and I’m not sure I’ll ever rid myself of the imposter syndrome that comes along with that uncertainty. But by opening up about this with friends, I’ve learned that I’m in very good company. I take solace in the fact so many of the people I respect most sometimes feel like imposters too. So many of us experience self-doubt.

What I can say, with complete confidence, is that, since getting here, I’ve worked hard. Even if I didn’t spend months hopping around from school to school on the “Oregon Trail,” now that I’m here, I’m on track, and I’m able to learn well and keep pace. To me, that feels like more of an accomplishment than anything that came before it.

If you’re nearing the end of the trail or wondering where the trail was to begin with, I hope that you can take some comfort in my confessions. Rest assured that no matter what happens or happened during your medical school application, med school itself is a chance to work hard and learn. It’s a chance to prove yourself – for yourself, and no one else.

Above all, I hope that you too find a supportive and kind community of fellow imposters to join your wagon on the trail, and keep you laughing during this bumpy, long ride.

Orly Farber is a medical student who blogs at Scope, where this article originally appeared.

Image credit: Shutterstock.com

Prev

The quest to cure medical professionals' student loan debt

June 27, 2019 Kevin 0
…
Next

How climate change affects your skin

June 27, 2019 Kevin 2
…

Tagged as: Medical school

Post navigation

< Previous Post
The quest to cure medical professionals' student loan debt
Next Post >
How climate change affects your skin

More by Orly Farber

  • What is an informed decision in the context of an addiction?

    Orly Farber
  • Even with education on hold, medical students still contribute

    Orly Farber
  • Medical school ends with a leap of faith

    Orly Farber

Related Posts

  • What inspires this medical student

    Jamie Katuna
  • Medical ethics and medical school: a student’s perspective

    Jacob Riegler
  • How medical school saved this student’s life

    Natasha Abadilla
  • The medical student who cries

    Orly Farber
  • First date with a medical student

    Dr. Glaucomflecken
  • Why this medical student tutors

    Michelle Ikoma

More in Education

  • The pros and cons of taking a gap year during medical school

    Med School Insiders
  • Breaking the silence: the truth about mental health challenges among medical students and why medical schools must take action

    Erin Waldrop
  • Breaking the stigma: Encouraging mental health help-seeking in medical trainees

    Anonymous
  • I’m not so different from Lionel Messi – and neither are you

    Lauren Tien
  • 6 ways ChatGPT can help you succeed in medical school

    Drew Bergman
  • Is it time to say goodbye to medical school rankings?

    James Goldchild
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Physician entrepreneurs offer hope for burned out doctors

      Cindy Rubin, MD | Physician
    • Why doctors aren’t to blame for the U.S. opioid crisis [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • The power of coaching for physicians: transforming thoughts, changing lives

      Kim Downey, PT | Conditions
    • The hidden factor in physician burnout: How the climate crisis is contributing to the erosion of well-being

      Elizabeth Cerceo, MD | Physician
    • Unlocking the secrets of cancer conferences: an end-of-life counselor’s journey among pharmaceutical giants

      Althea Halchuck, EJD | Conditions
    • We need a new Hippocratic Oath that puts patient autonomy first

      Jeffrey A. Singer, MD | Physician
  • Past 6 Months

    • “Is your surgeon really skilled? The hidden threat to public safety in medicine.

      Gene Uzawa Dorio, MD | Physician
    • It’s time to replace the 0 to 10 pain intensity scale with a better measure

      Mark Sullivan, MD and Jane Ballantyne, MD | Conditions
    • Breaking point: the 5 reasons American doctors are dreaming of walking away from medicine

      Amol Shrikhande, MD | Physician
    • Revolutionize your practice: the value-based care model that reduces physician burnout

      Chandravadan Patel, MD | Physician
    • Breaking the cycle of racism in health care: a call for anti-racist action

      Tomi Mitchell, MD | Policy
    • Unveiling the hidden damage: the secretive world of medical boards

      Alan Lindemann, MD | Physician
  • Recent Posts

    • Empowering Black nurses for lasting change [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Master time management with 7 productivity strategies for optimal results

      Farzana Hoque, MD | Physician
    • Proposed USPSTF guideline update: Advocating for earlier breast cancer screening at age 40

      Hoag Memorial Hospital Presbyterian | Conditions
    • The rising threat of lung cancer in Asian American female nonsmokers

      Alice S. Y. Lee, MD | Conditions
    • The tragic story of Mr. G: a painful journey towards understanding suicide

      William Lynes, MD | Physician
    • Healing trauma and reconnecting: Unmasking the impact of dissociation [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast

Subscribe to KevinMD and never miss a story!

Get free updates delivered free to your inbox.


Find jobs at
Careers by KevinMD.com

Search thousands of physician, PA, NP, and CRNA jobs now.

Learn more

Leave a Comment

Founded in 2004 by Kevin Pho, MD, KevinMD.com is the web’s leading platform where physicians, advanced practitioners, nurses, medical students, and patients share their insight and tell their stories.

Social

  • Like on Facebook
  • Follow on Twitter
  • Connect on Linkedin
  • Subscribe on Youtube
  • Instagram

CME Spotlights

From MedPage Today

Latest News

  • What Was Tied to Lower Long COVID Risk?
  • Chemo-Free Approach Works in Subset of Patients With HER2+ Early Breast Cancer
  • Two-Drug Combo Wins for Refractory Gout
  • First-in-Class Sjogren's Drug Passes Mid-Stage Test
  • Pricey Drug Combo Boosts PFS in First-Line Advanced Ovarian Cancer

Meeting Coverage

  • Chemo-Free Approach Works in Subset of Patients With HER2+ Early Breast Cancer
  • Two-Drug Combo Wins for Refractory Gout
  • First-in-Class Sjogren's Drug Passes Mid-Stage Test
  • Pricey Drug Combo Boosts PFS in First-Line Advanced Ovarian Cancer
  • Cardiovascular Risk Models Still Fall Short for Arthritis Patients
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Physician entrepreneurs offer hope for burned out doctors

      Cindy Rubin, MD | Physician
    • Why doctors aren’t to blame for the U.S. opioid crisis [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • The power of coaching for physicians: transforming thoughts, changing lives

      Kim Downey, PT | Conditions
    • The hidden factor in physician burnout: How the climate crisis is contributing to the erosion of well-being

      Elizabeth Cerceo, MD | Physician
    • Unlocking the secrets of cancer conferences: an end-of-life counselor’s journey among pharmaceutical giants

      Althea Halchuck, EJD | Conditions
    • We need a new Hippocratic Oath that puts patient autonomy first

      Jeffrey A. Singer, MD | Physician
  • Past 6 Months

    • “Is your surgeon really skilled? The hidden threat to public safety in medicine.

      Gene Uzawa Dorio, MD | Physician
    • It’s time to replace the 0 to 10 pain intensity scale with a better measure

      Mark Sullivan, MD and Jane Ballantyne, MD | Conditions
    • Breaking point: the 5 reasons American doctors are dreaming of walking away from medicine

      Amol Shrikhande, MD | Physician
    • Revolutionize your practice: the value-based care model that reduces physician burnout

      Chandravadan Patel, MD | Physician
    • Breaking the cycle of racism in health care: a call for anti-racist action

      Tomi Mitchell, MD | Policy
    • Unveiling the hidden damage: the secretive world of medical boards

      Alan Lindemann, MD | Physician
  • Recent Posts

    • Empowering Black nurses for lasting change [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Master time management with 7 productivity strategies for optimal results

      Farzana Hoque, MD | Physician
    • Proposed USPSTF guideline update: Advocating for earlier breast cancer screening at age 40

      Hoag Memorial Hospital Presbyterian | Conditions
    • The rising threat of lung cancer in Asian American female nonsmokers

      Alice S. Y. Lee, MD | Conditions
    • The tragic story of Mr. G: a painful journey towards understanding suicide

      William Lynes, MD | Physician
    • Healing trauma and reconnecting: Unmasking the impact of dissociation [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast

MedPage Today Professional

An Everyday Health Property Medpage Today
  • Terms of Use | Disclaimer
  • Privacy Policy
  • DMCA Policy
All Content © KevinMD, LLC
Site by Outthink Group

Leave a Comment

Comments are moderated before they are published. Please read the comment policy.

Loading Comments...