Find your why. It makes all the difference.

On my site, I spend a lot of time talking finances.  And I’ve yet to mention what is by far the best investment that I have ever taken part in.  It has provided my best return on investment and biggest annual interest growth.  It also requires the most work, but this investment is what keeps me in the market and sticking to the plan.  In fact, it is “my why” behind much of the plan in the first place.  What I am talking about is, of course, my marriage to my amazing wife.  Seriously, she is incredible.  She is my “why.”

Your why may be completely different, but I want you to have the same amount of passion for it as I do for mine. Let me lay it out there.  This is how my wife helps propel me to be all that I can be for her and our kids. I can only hope that I do the same for her.  Being on the same page in marriage is so important.  Find your why.  It makes all the difference.

She provides perspective

People ask me all the time, “With research, work, your website, inventions, medical malpractice work … how do you balance all of the different things that you do?”

The answer is always a lot simpler than people expect, “My wife.”

When I get taken away by the swift streams that are my many side hustles (and my main hustle, being a doctor), my wife is the one who paddles me back to shore. She serves as a constant reminder of why I am doing what I am doing.  She was (and is) the rock that got us through medical school, residency, and fellowship.

In a great twist of irony, God decided to make all three of my kids look 100 percent like her (i.e., very little like me).  (This is fortunate for my kids as my wife is substantially better looking than me. That’s a fact, by the way; not an opinion.) Maybe this was God’s way of reminding me once again how incredible my wife is and how little I deserve her.  I get to see it in three little humans that live in my house.

She fills in my gaps

Some of my main strengths include abstract thought and big-picture planning.  I am a philosopher to the core.  However, getting down into the weeds and nitty-gritty detail isn’t exactly my strength.  I am fortunate, though, because being detail oriented is one of my wife’s many strengths.  This is just one example of how she fills in my many gaps.

Some of her other strengths include that she is independent, reliable, and trust-worthy.

She helps manage the concrete actions of our financial health.  In fact, she pays every bill that we receive.  The roof over our head and the food in our belly is always arranged by my wife (even if I end up picking up the groceries or cooking the meal).

She supports me

My wife is supportive.  She allows me to focus on writing these blog posts, creating inventions, doing medical malpractice work, and doing research at home.  And when I am doing it too much, she also supports me in being a better husband and dad by NOT allowing me to do these things.

She never lets me forget why I am doing what I am doing.

After all, life is not about getting to your goals.  You have to enjoy the journey along the way. Otherwise, you’ll be miserable while you obtain your goals just to find out you’re likely going to be miserable when you get there.  My wife helps me slow down and appreciate the here and now.

She is my “why”

While my wife provides perspective and fills in all the many gaps that I have, she also serves as the driving force for all of the many things that I do.  I don’t have to look far to see how hard she is working.  My wife is the best mother and wife I know.

Oh, and while she somehow manages being a full-time wife and mother of three, she is also an active member in the church, a wonderful friend to others, and a part-time reading interventionist (read: elementary school teacher).

She is so intentional at helping others around her.  Sometimes this comes out via bringing others meals when they are having a hard time or by visiting with a friend just to talk.  She always finds time for other people.

This helps me want to do the best that I can for her and my three kids.  I am just trying to follow her example.

What’s/who’s your why?

Given that half of my blog is about wealth and the other half is about wellness, she is the one of the few things that continually contributes to both my wellness and my wealth.  I guess that’s why they call her “my better half.”

Maybe it’s time you spent figuring out why you are doing what you are doing.  We have to make sure we enjoy the journey as much as the goal at the end of the road.

“The Physician Philosopher” is an anesthesiologist who blogs at his self-titled site, The Physician Philosopher.

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