Skip to content
  • About
  • Contact
  • Contribute
  • Book
  • Careers
  • Podcast
  • Recommended
  • Speaking
  • All
  • Physician
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
  • Video
    • All
    • Physician
    • Practice
    • Policy
    • Finance
    • Conditions
    • .edu
    • Patient
    • Meds
    • Tech
    • Social
    • Video
    • About
    • Contact
    • Contribute
    • Book
    • Careers
    • Podcast
    • Recommended
    • Speaking

As we get older and the world changes, it’s not always an easy task to say “where”

Michele Luckenbaugh
Conditions
August 25, 2022
28 Shares
Share
Tweet
Share

“Where does it hurt?”

As a child, I can remember this ubiquitous question being frequently asked of me. Having grown up on a farm, there was always some trouble for me to get into. A common hazard was my older sister’s 26-inch bicycle, which had no training wheels.

At age 5, if I was to be a “big kid,” I had to master the art of riding the “big” bike on our gravel driveway. It was inevitable that I would fall off with the result of skinned-up knees and blood dripping down my legs. As tears flowed down my cheeks, I would run into the house, and my mom would only have to glance in my direction and know exactly what hurt and needed her immediate attention. Mercurochrome and bandaids to the rescue.

As we get older, it’s not always an easy task to say where it hurts. When we were young, if we had a bump or a bruise, a parent might simply kiss the source of pain to make it all better. Sometimes, it did surprisingly help. But as our lives move along on their journeys, with their twists and turns, our response to this question becomes more ambiguous.

At times, we find ourselves bombarded with troubling circumstances: a cancer diagnosis, a faltering heart, our aging parent given a diagnosis of dementia. There may be no easy answers or solutions.

We rely on our faith and the skills of our medical professionals to help us navigate the hazards placed before us. The world, especially during these times during the COVID pandemic, has been turned upside down.

Lockdowns, isolation, and masking became major components of protecting ourselves and those we love from contracting this sly killer. As vaccinations were developed and distributed among the population, the feeling of despair began to slowly lift away.

However, this time of stress and anxiety left its indelible mark on our minds and spirits.

A deep rift formed in America — it separated those who believed in the science of the COVID vaccine and those who did not. Say what you want, but it can’t be denied that vaccination has saved lives.

COVID has taken several forms since it first hit our shores. Mortality and hospitalization rates have diminished since the onset, but the latest version, the BA.5 variant, has proven to be a formidable opponent. This version, as we know, is spreading rapidly among the population.

Vaccinated or unvaccinated, it seems to not significantly matter in terms of contracting the disease, although the severity of the disease is somewhat lessened when the individual has been vaccinated.

As someone who has tried to live as normally as possible during these past two-plus years, I still lie awake at night wondering what will be next. “Where does it hurt?” is the question I posed. I am not able to point to a physical location within my body, but instead, I feel the pain emanating from my heart and spirit. My confidence in my country, in my world, has been shaken. Loved ones lost, life experiences altered, time never to be reclaimed. My trust has been shaken.

Normal — what does that term mean? It certainly doesn’t mean to me what it meant five years ago. Normal now means dealing with the hand we are all dealt because of COVID and trying to make the best of it. To move forward into what has to be called “unchartered” waters as we await what is to come next. The monkeypox virus or an undiscovered variant of COVID. A feeling of restlessness, exhaustion, and emptiness is almost palpable. I wish there were medicine or a “kiss on my forehead” that would resolve these feelings, but sadly no.

In the words of one of my favorite poets, Mary Oliver: “I want to think again of dangerous and noble things. I want to be light and frolicsome. I want to be improbable, beautiful, and afraid of nothing as if I had wings.”

And so, I offer my prayers to my Lord to bring me comfort and to guide me on my journey. For Him, all things are possible.

To all who work in health care — physicians, nurses, respiratory therapists, etc. — I can only imagine the distress you have experienced:

  • Trying to fight a faceless enemy while placing ourselves continually in harm’s way
  • Being present as the lives of your patients slip away, despite your best efforts
  • Exhaustion as the pandemic continues and evolves
  • A feeling that your best efforts go unnoticed by the public you serve and the health systems which employ you
  • Trying to see the “light at the end of the tunnel” seems to be getting farther and farther away

Please do not lose hope or the belief that your life’s work does not matter. It most certainly does. Be aware not only of the narratives of your patients but also of your own. Care for yourself so that you may care for others. Find joy and comfort from those who hold you close to their hearts. Go out into the nighttime sky and look upwards to the heavens and the shining stars that burn through the cloud cover. If you listen carefully, you will hear the inner voice within you, giving you the wisdom to continue. God bless you all.

Michele Luckenbaugh is a patient advocate. 

Image credit: Shutterstock.com

Prev

When medicine surrenders to the body

August 25, 2022 Kevin 0
…
Next

A doctor for LGBTQ+ health needs [PODCAST]

August 25, 2022 Kevin 0
…

Tagged as: Primary Care

Post navigation

< Previous Post
When medicine surrenders to the body
Next Post >
A doctor for LGBTQ+ health needs [PODCAST]

More by Michele Luckenbaugh

  • A patient’s perspective on the diminishing relationship between doctors and patients

    Michele Luckenbaugh
  • How I overcame a heart attack and health challenges with the help of faith, family, and skilled doctors

    Michele Luckenbaugh
  • Transparency and honesty: the keys to fixing America’s broken health care system

    Michele Luckenbaugh

Related Posts

  • Health care workers should not be targets

    Lori E. Johnson
  • How social media can help or hurt your health care career

    Health eCareers
  • Who is caring for the care workers?

    Carole A. Estabrooks, PhD and Stephanie Chamberlain
  • Who says doctors don’t care?

    Cindy Thompson
  • Why health care replaced physician care

    Michael Weiss, MD
  • Care is no longer personal. Care is political.

    Eva Kittay, PhD

More in Conditions

  • Urgent innovation needed to address growing mental health crisis among children and families

    Monika Roots, MD
  • The importance of listening in health care: a mother’s journey advocating for children with chronic Lyme disease

    Cheryl Lazarus
  • The unjust reality of racial disparities in pediatric kidney transplants

    Lien Morcate
  • The surprising medical mystery of a “good” Hitler: How a rescued kitten revealed a rare movement disorder

    Teresella Gondolo, MD
  • The power of coaching for physicians: transforming thoughts, changing lives

    Kim Downey, PT
  • Unlocking the secrets of cancer conferences: an end-of-life counselor’s journey among pharmaceutical giants

    Althea Halchuck, EJD
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • The power of coaching for physicians: transforming thoughts, changing lives

      Kim Downey, PT | Conditions
    • The hidden factor in physician burnout: How the climate crisis is contributing to the erosion of well-being

      Elizabeth Cerceo, MD | Physician
    • Why affirmative action is crucial for health equity and social justice in medicine

      Katrina Gipson, MD, MPH | Policy
    • Unlocking the secrets of cancer conferences: an end-of-life counselor’s journey among pharmaceutical giants

      Althea Halchuck, EJD | Conditions
    • Why doctors aren’t to blame for the U.S. opioid crisis [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Nose-brain connection: The surprising link between allergies and mental health revealed

      Kara Wada, MD | Conditions
  • Past 6 Months

    • It’s time to replace the 0 to 10 pain intensity scale with a better measure

      Mark Sullivan, MD and Jane Ballantyne, MD | Conditions
    • “Is your surgeon really skilled? The hidden threat to public safety in medicine.

      Gene Uzawa Dorio, MD | Physician
    • Breaking point: the 5 reasons American doctors are dreaming of walking away from medicine

      Amol Shrikhande, MD | Physician
    • Revolutionize your practice: the value-based care model that reduces physician burnout

      Chandravadan Patel, MD | Physician
    • Unveiling the hidden damage: the secretive world of medical boards

      Alan Lindemann, MD | Physician
    • Breaking the cycle of racism in health care: a call for anti-racist action

      Tomi Mitchell, MD | Policy
  • Recent Posts

    • Urgent innovation needed to address growing mental health crisis among children and families

      Monika Roots, MD | Conditions
    • The importance of listening in health care: a mother’s journey advocating for children with chronic Lyme disease

      Cheryl Lazarus | Conditions
    • Medical errors and the power of apologies [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Finding your ideal work-life balance: tips for prioritizing personal life and achieving professional success

      Zahid Awan, MD | Physician
    • Boxing legends Tyson and Foreman: powerful lessons for a resilient and evolving health care future

      Harvey Castro, MD, MBA | Physician
    • 7 ways to beat burnout: a guide for health care professionals to reduce stress and reclaim their passion

      Marie Livesey, DO | Physician

Subscribe to KevinMD and never miss a story!

Get free updates delivered free to your inbox.


Find jobs at
Careers by KevinMD.com

Search thousands of physician, PA, NP, and CRNA jobs now.

Learn more

View 2 Comments >

Founded in 2004 by Kevin Pho, MD, KevinMD.com is the web’s leading platform where physicians, advanced practitioners, nurses, medical students, and patients share their insight and tell their stories.

Social

  • Like on Facebook
  • Follow on Twitter
  • Connect on Linkedin
  • Subscribe on Youtube
  • Instagram

CME Spotlights

From MedPage Today

Latest News

  • How to Set Up Your Referral Network
  • Missing Doctor's Gunshot Wound; COVID Funds Reshuffled; Helpline Chatbot Shut Down
  • Second RSV Vaccine Lands Approval for Older Adults
  • Long COVID Cognitive, Depressive Symptoms Tied to Brain Inflammation Marker
  • 'Practice Changing' Trial on Activity Recs After Prolapse Surgery

Meeting Coverage

  • Tenapanor Improves Abdominal Symptoms in Patients With IBS-C
  • Benefits Found for Hand OA Drug Treatments
  • MRI-Based Screening May Detect Prostate Cancer Earlier
  • New Model Aims to Study Intestinal Fibrosis in Crohn's Disease
  • Hypertension Tied to Worse Survival After Surgery for Upper Tract Urothelial Cancers
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • The power of coaching for physicians: transforming thoughts, changing lives

      Kim Downey, PT | Conditions
    • The hidden factor in physician burnout: How the climate crisis is contributing to the erosion of well-being

      Elizabeth Cerceo, MD | Physician
    • Why affirmative action is crucial for health equity and social justice in medicine

      Katrina Gipson, MD, MPH | Policy
    • Unlocking the secrets of cancer conferences: an end-of-life counselor’s journey among pharmaceutical giants

      Althea Halchuck, EJD | Conditions
    • Why doctors aren’t to blame for the U.S. opioid crisis [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Nose-brain connection: The surprising link between allergies and mental health revealed

      Kara Wada, MD | Conditions
  • Past 6 Months

    • It’s time to replace the 0 to 10 pain intensity scale with a better measure

      Mark Sullivan, MD and Jane Ballantyne, MD | Conditions
    • “Is your surgeon really skilled? The hidden threat to public safety in medicine.

      Gene Uzawa Dorio, MD | Physician
    • Breaking point: the 5 reasons American doctors are dreaming of walking away from medicine

      Amol Shrikhande, MD | Physician
    • Revolutionize your practice: the value-based care model that reduces physician burnout

      Chandravadan Patel, MD | Physician
    • Unveiling the hidden damage: the secretive world of medical boards

      Alan Lindemann, MD | Physician
    • Breaking the cycle of racism in health care: a call for anti-racist action

      Tomi Mitchell, MD | Policy
  • Recent Posts

    • Urgent innovation needed to address growing mental health crisis among children and families

      Monika Roots, MD | Conditions
    • The importance of listening in health care: a mother’s journey advocating for children with chronic Lyme disease

      Cheryl Lazarus | Conditions
    • Medical errors and the power of apologies [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Finding your ideal work-life balance: tips for prioritizing personal life and achieving professional success

      Zahid Awan, MD | Physician
    • Boxing legends Tyson and Foreman: powerful lessons for a resilient and evolving health care future

      Harvey Castro, MD, MBA | Physician
    • 7 ways to beat burnout: a guide for health care professionals to reduce stress and reclaim their passion

      Marie Livesey, DO | Physician

MedPage Today Professional

An Everyday Health Property Medpage Today
  • Terms of Use | Disclaimer
  • Privacy Policy
  • DMCA Policy
All Content © KevinMD, LLC
Site by Outthink Group

As we get older and the world changes, it’s not always an easy task to say “where”
2 comments

Comments are moderated before they are published. Please read the comment policy.

Loading Comments...