Comments on: Can stealing in childhood be normal, and when should parents worry? http://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2009/08/can-stealing-in-childhood-be-normal-and-when-should-parents-worry.html Tue, 14 Feb 2012 23:00:00 +0000 hourly 1 By: Mooiehttp://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2009/08/can-stealing-in-childhood-be-normal-and-when-should-parents-worry.html#comment-110591 Mooie Thu, 27 Aug 2009 15:16:52 +0000 http://www.kevinmd.com/blog/?p=39654#comment-110591 My sister was stealing when she was four, five and six... and my parents didn't do pay much attention to it or they downplayed it: oh, she's just a baby, she'll grow out of it.And that's why she's spent a lot of time in jail/prison in the last twenty or so years... My sister was stealing when she was four, five and six… and my parents didn’t do pay much attention to it or they downplayed it: oh, she’s just a baby, she’ll grow out of it.

And that’s why she’s spent a lot of time in jail/prison in the last twenty or so years…

]]> By: MWAShttp://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2009/08/can-stealing-in-childhood-be-normal-and-when-should-parents-worry.html#comment-110428 MWAS Tue, 25 Aug 2009 18:17:39 +0000 http://www.kevinmd.com/blog/?p=39654#comment-110428 Parents often ask questions during check-ups about lying, too. My answer would be similar for both. Conscience and guilt or remorse are developing concepts for the five and under group. Euphemistically, stealing is taking something that doesn't belong to you which is a common behavior for toddlers who are trying to tackle to concepts of sharing. So, taking what doesn't belong to you can be normal behavior - the same behavior one time in an 8 year old would have different, more stringent consequences. The younger the child, the more "teachable moments" needed. The older the child, the more red flags emerge. Parents often ask questions during check-ups about lying, too. My answer would be similar for both. Conscience and guilt or remorse are developing concepts for the five and under group. Euphemistically, stealing is taking something that doesn’t belong to you which is a common behavior for toddlers who are trying to tackle to concepts of sharing. So, taking what doesn’t belong to you can be normal behavior – the same behavior one time in an 8 year old would have different, more stringent consequences. The younger the child, the more “teachable moments” needed. The older the child, the more red flags emerge.

]]> By: VendorMDhttp://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2009/08/can-stealing-in-childhood-be-normal-and-when-should-parents-worry.html#comment-110415 VendorMD Tue, 25 Aug 2009 17:36:28 +0000 http://www.kevinmd.com/blog/?p=39654#comment-110415 Yeah I agree! This is a teachable moment. A child will try to push limits in all directions. Once he is told this is not acceptable he will most likely never do it again. Ignoring it will make validate stealing and make it worse. Yeah I agree! This is a teachable moment. A child will try to push limits in all directions. Once he is told this is not acceptable he will most likely never do it again. Ignoring it will make validate stealing and make it worse.

]]> By: anonhttp://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2009/08/can-stealing-in-childhood-be-normal-and-when-should-parents-worry.html#comment-110414 anon Tue, 25 Aug 2009 17:22:30 +0000 http://www.kevinmd.com/blog/?p=39654#comment-110414 "Encounters with Children" by Dixon and Stein, comes to mind.I don't know what "pattern of stealing without remorse" means. A child about age three, I'd say doesn't yet have the concept of property rights. It's attractive, take it. The child hasn't yet developed the ability to understand things from another child's perspective, or property rights in general. That doesn't mean you don't try to teach the child, but some sort of confrontation is counterproductive. The child sees something attractive in the store and you notice it in the kids hands outside the store, you say Uh, Oh, we have to put that back, or Uh Oh, we have to pay for that (candy that the kid chewed through). “Encounters with Children” by Dixon and Stein, comes to mind.

I don’t know what “pattern of stealing without remorse” means. A child about age three, I’d say doesn’t yet have the concept of property rights. It’s attractive, take it. The child hasn’t yet developed the ability to understand things from another child’s perspective, or property rights in general. That doesn’t mean you don’t try to teach the child, but some sort of confrontation is counterproductive. The child sees something attractive in the store and you notice it in the kids hands outside the store, you say Uh, Oh, we have to put that back, or Uh Oh, we have to pay for that (candy that the kid chewed through).

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